This year, 2020, has been the year from hell for many… and that’s putting it lightly.
As I write this, more than 223,000 people in the United States have perished due to the pandemic COVID-19, and with that, are countless more suffering from the loss of a loved one.
In my personal opinion, western culture has not been the healthiest in terms of how we deal with grief. So I felt it was necessary and important to shed some light on what grief really is, and how to deal with it in ourself and others.
For many, showing sadness or shedding tears somehow means weakness… but we should know that is not the case.
Showing emotions does not mean you are weak.
We are emotional creatures as much as we are logical ones, and the suppression of those emotions can lead to much worse manifestations in other ways… but more often than not, only leaves us feeling that much more alone and desolate.
But one of the most important things I’ve learned recently when grieving is that you are never alone. There are others grieving with you, always.
Grieving is the emotional process of coping with the loss of what once was, but we should remember to be grateful for the time and memories we shared with that person, and that they are now no longer in pain or torment, but finally at peace.
It is okay to also come to be at peace, yourself, too. You are not a bad person for allowing yourself to feel relief or whatever you are feeling… it’s ALL okay!
Understanding Grief
I came across a post on Twitter that presented an excellent illustration of what dealing with grief looks like…
This analogy really hit the nail on the head for me, and I hope that it brings to light what dealing with grief looks like from an abstract perspective for you, too.
Grief never really goes away, but it is something we learn to move on from and deal with, in time, and is important to establish healthy guidelines for dealing with it, for ourselves and others.
When a friend is grieving
When a friend is dealing with console/comfort someone dealing with grief… sometimes the best thing to do is to just sit in that grief with them.
This infographic from Refuge in Grief illustrates the best tactics to respond or support someone who is currently grieving.
Dealing with grief yourself
The thought of pushing yourself to do things you don’t want to do while you’re in a state of emotional turmoil can sometimes be unbearable… but the following are simple, and effective ways to give yourself the love and care that you need.
Personally, I have picked up the habit of tending to my new plant friends around the house, which has really brought a sense of unexpected peace, as well as cuddling and loving on my little furr babies, my cats Lynx and George.
Closing thoughts
One of the best resources I’ve found lately that has helped my healing journey is the app Headspace.
Meditating for just a few moments a day can bring clarity and space for the healing process to really transform, as well as guidance through the emotional journey, and I highly recommend it.
I hope you found the contents of this post to be meaningful or helpful in any way, and I’d love to hear from you if you’d wish to connect further.
Take care of yourself.
Warm regards,
Cassie
